144: Who are you without your fears?
We call it being responsible. Most of the time it's just reacting.
Who am I without my fears?
It's a question I keep asking. The answer keeps evolving. And every time it does, my life gets bigger.
The truth is, if we don’t ask the question, we’ll never know the answer. And most of us will die never having lived that version of ourselves.
I had a few beautiful conversations this week that inspired me to write this. One of them was with Marc Engel during our most recent episode of In Full-Light.
We asked him to share one thing he was proud of from building his business, and he said:
“I am proud that I decided to try.”
I shared the image that came to me as I listened to him describe his work.
I saw him walking into these organizations with a big bag on his back, full of hearts. And to every person he meets, he gives one back.
He brings heart back to corporations that are lost in their own heads. He puts connection and relationship at the center, where performance took over for so long.
And he told us he was only able to build what he built, and become who he is, because he did not choose the safe path.
This version of himself is an answer to a question he asked years ago, and the world is lucky he had the courage to walk outside the walls of his fears.
How many lives go un-lived because of fear? Fear that will most likely never materialize.
And even if it does, then what?
We’re so attached to outcomes that any result we didn’t want gets called a mistake. So we learn: if the result didn’t go as planned, I failed, and I shouldn’t risk it again. And that’s how the walls get built. Higher and higher, made of fear. We call staying inside them safety, and every step outside irresponsible.
This isn’t about being irresponsible.
In fact, I want to invite a deeper thought here. Researchers at Penn State tracked people who worry chronically and found that more than 90% of their worries never came true. For about one in four of them, not a single worry came true. The fear lived in the mind and nowhere else.
I wonder how much creative life force we waste inside our fears. How many adventures die in the name of safety.
How many versions of heaven never get to exist in the physical world, because we become our fears.
Because we build a life from fear-based decisions.
In the name of a false sense of safety, we live disconnected from our essence, settling for a mediocre life and calling it responsible.
But how can that be?
To be responsible means to be able to respond. And if you’re living a protected life ruled by your fears, you’re not responding at all. You’re only reacting. Not even to reality, but to an old version of yourself. A version that learned life is something you survive, not something you build.
Who am I without my fears? I am discovering myself in this process, and I can’t stop asking the question.
If you’re honest, the answer reveals a path. The path of your soul.
Age doesn’t matter. I believe this is a timeless question, and it’s never too late to find the answer.
The freedom, the abundance, the sense of service you’re looking for lives exactly where your fear is. There are no shortcuts.
Who are you without your fears? You are someone grounded in your truth, connected to spirit, living a life guided by your inner wisdom.
If you haven’t asked this question yet, now is a great time. Don’t rush the answer. Bring safety to your system before you ask, and open up to receive.
With Love,
Carolina
Asking the question is easier when you know where you’re standing.
The Harmony Map is a short assessment that looks at nine frequencies across three parts of your life: you, your business, and your connection to the divine. It shows you which ones are operating as strengths and which ones represent a personal breakthrough. Most people find at least one place where fear has been making the decisions for a long time.
That’s a good place to start asking more questions from.
Who We Are Celebrating This Week: Marc Engel
Marc Engel is our guest on this week’s episode of In Full Light, and we’re celebrating him for the deep work he does in supporting his clients, and his willingness to step into the unknown.
He runs The Third Space out of Bangkok, where he works with founders and creative leaders on team chemistry.
Prior to starting his coaching practice, Marc had a good career in asset management in Switzerland, foloowing a structured path, and with the safety it promised. Then a breakup knocked him sideways, and one afternoon he was sitting in front of a Bloomberg terminal looking at the charts and realized he couldn’t care less about any of it. He walked away from the whole setup and started over.
Mac challenges his clients to look one level deeper.
Things I’d like to share
We came here for the connection, then handed it to the machine
A client told me last week that he figured he should have three hundred subscribers by now, for all the effort he’s put into his notes and essays. He’s got about a hundred or so.
You're already consistent. Just not with the new thing.
Next Monday I will start going to the gym, three times a week. I am excited.
Memorable Quote
“We Suffer more often in imagination than in reality.” - Seneca