What struck me most was Andrew's story about breaking through his lifelong patterns at the Conscious Capitalism Summit. A simple interaction with a fellow entrepreneur named Megan became a "Matrix moment" that transformed not just how he communicates, but how he shows up in the world. This wasn't about learning new techniques—it was about embodying a different way of being.
Now, as someone Forbes calls "the Dale Carnegie for the digital age," Andrew helps other leaders navigate the deep work of authentic connection while building successful businesses. His insights on transforming our relationship with fear, understanding emotional patterns, and finding flow states offer a roadmap for anyone seeking to align their work with their deepest truth.
Show Notes
[00:03:00] - The Foundation: Why Connection Became Andrew's Obsession
Bullied in Maui, struggled with social connection
First moment of agency at 13: deciding to change by talking to girls despite fear
Mother was 13-time published author in interpersonal dynamics
Learned communication techniques but internal insecurity remained
[00:05:18] - The Matrix Moment: Authenticity as Service
Attended Gestalt Awareness Practice workshop
Three pillars: authenticity, curiosity, presence
Breakthrough conversation with Megan (media entrepreneur)
Realized his anxiety came from stories, not reality
[00:16:47] - The Career Pivot: From Tech CEO to Executive Coach
Built Tribute.co to eight figures
First coach Lauren Zander told him "you're a coach at heart"
Needed two years to exit with integrity
Discovered he was good at coaching from day one
[00:23:28] - The Power of Autotelic Activities
Definition: activities done for their own sake
Surfing as metaphor—exercise happens, but enjoyment is the point
Flow states and peak performance
Why doing what you want leads to better outcomes
[00:30:23] - Working with Fear and Upper Limits Patterns
Scarcity mindset persisting despite financial success
Upper limits work from Gay Hendricks
No enemy in the mind or emotions
Emotional inquiry and understanding positive intent
[00:40:06] - Breaking Childhood Patterns
Breaking the Cycle exercise
Childhood patterns from primary caregivers
Carry Forward vs Break the Cycle lists
Understanding negative love syndrome
Key Quotes
"When done consciously, my authenticity could be an implicit act of service." - Andrew Horn
"They all are doing what they're doing because they want to be doing it." - On what successful entrepreneurs have in common
"Any emotion that is presenting itself is there fundamentally because it is trying to serve us." - Andrew Horn
"There's no enemy in the mind. There's no enemy in the emotions." - Andrew Horn
"Context, what it is that we're feeling and thinking about the thing, is going to be much more important for improving performance than a new skill or technique." - Andrew Horn
Resources Mentioned
Gestalt Awareness Practice (Esalen Institute)
"The Big Leap" by Gay Hendricks (Upper Limits work)
"Flow" by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (Flow states research)
"The Work" by Byron Katie (Thought inquiry)
Lauren Zander (Andrew's first coach, Handel Group)
Hoffman Process (Childhood pattern work)
Diana Chapman (Three tiers of integrity)
Brian Franklin (Ecology of emotions)
Where to Find Andrew
Substack: Relational Leadership
Website: itsandrewhorne.com
Retreats: Quarterly leadership retreats for men (entrepreneurs) in New York, Los Angeles, and Austin
Thank You
A huge thank you to Andrew for sharing his journey and wisdom with our community. And thank you to everyone who joined us live or is catching up with the recording,
Please Share
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What’s next?
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